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Thursday, June 14, 2012

Finding Wings

“It is by falling you find your wings.”

My wings
            Are courtesy of you;
I guess I should be thankful
            For those wings you have given.

Game of Angels …
Falling in love …
Falling together as debris …
Wings falling …
Broken wings? 

Our love is a fated fledgling,
            Never to grow old,
            Never to develop its wings.

Free fall …   You
Send me flying to another;
Flying from my personal heaven -
            Flying towards my personal hell?

Falling without a net.


Ariel
August 4, 2005

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Not A Game


This is not a game;
            You are unable to love me
            And I am unable to stop loving you.

So we are left at a stalemate,
            Guilt-burdened at not being
            Able to play the role the other needs. 

This time I cannot devise
            A satisfying end-game
            That will allow us both to win.


Ariel
August 3, 2005

Many Men


Have I had many men in my bed?
            No, not in my bed;
            Only my husband. 

But I have had many men
            In their beds,
In their many beds. 

When the craving grows
            And I know you do not want me
            In your bed, at your door … 

I go to their doors instead,
            To their beds –
            Their many beds.

Ariel
July 8, 2005

Pause

I am retreating
            Back into a shell,
A habit when I am aware
            That I am unacceptable.
I am conscious of that retreat
And it gives me pause;
I want to say something and, if
            I can’t coach it right, I say nothing.
Unacceptable – The questions
            Have become the answers. 

Ariel

July 6, 2005

Every Thousand Caresses


Every thousand caresses
            & familiar rhythms
            Wakens me.
I feel where your secret desire
            Holds your sacred scent.

I remember you, wild creature;
            I, your perfumed goddess.


            Ariel
June 2005

Monday, June 11, 2012

Great Heroics

I dream of great heroics;
            saving others by sacrifice,
            saving you by being strong in will.

Yet I  cower;

Craving a chance to prove my worth
            or a pardon that forgives my inadequacies
            whatever will confirm we are worth fighting for,
And yet rejection comes more frequently;
            rejection from you creates doubt.
            Doubt still makes me cower.


Ariel
September 27, 2004

Going To Write

I was going to write about how wrong this was
            How it could only be bad for us if we don’t;
You are under no commitment to me
            Contradictory to how I feel
            And I can’t ask for one.
Me feelings about it are just that –
            My feelings, not yours.
I do wish you would reconsider
            I have tried to accept you as you are,
            The way I would want anybody to accept me.


Ariel
September 2004

Mankind

Martin, I’m afraid
You’re mistaken
Mankind is tragically flawed.

How else can you explain
            The callousness
            The mean selfishness
            And no mercy?

How else can you explain
            Parents who murder their children,
            Men who routinely beat their wives,
            The arguments among family and friends,
            And the jokes that tear down the worth
                        Of those we profess to love?

Mankind does not only separate the “other” from “My Kind”;
            It divorces itself from everybody.
            It is not color man despises, it is everyone,
                        Old, Young, Black, White, Red, Gay, Straight.

At what point do spouses cease to be lovers?
            Even lovers grant no true favors.

Incapable of trust; Tragically flawed!


Ariel

October 1, 2004

Do Not Learn

No,
I do not learn
            From past experiences

I keep opening up
            & trusting.


Ariel
Oct 2004

Not Safe To Say

There are many things
            That are not safe to say.

“Fire”
            In a crowded building.
“Let’s do lunch”
            To a male collegue.
The details of a job proposal
            To a coworker.
“I disagree with Bush”
            To a soldier’s wife.

Or “I love you”
            To you.

Ariel
October 2004

Friday, June 8, 2012

My Hunger

damn!
my hunger
            can haunt you.

perhaps you will ask
            me to linger.


Ariel

October 2004

Affair With the Moon

Ariel ChasingTiger
Affair with the Moon


Even though I glance at it
            Only now and then,
If the moon were to end
            So would my world.
It’s nightly caress between
            Evening and night
Is necessary to inspire
            The blushing day.

So it is with our passion;
            Seldom seen, but constantly there.


Ariel

October 2004

Bridging The Distance

If she could
She would do something, anything.
She does:
She drowns herself in poetry, sex and distraction,
Submerges herself in activities and people,
Trying to collect enough friends to dull
The emptiness you leave in her heart.
Whenever she senses she can’t
Bridge the distance between you and she,
She adds a project, a new hobby
To span the time
To cross over the current of desire.


Ariel
September 2004

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Cost of an Angel

angel, can you smile
when you lack a sensual flame?

i do miss that familiar joy;
how life becomes a beautiful surround
i can linger in
after that flight of rhythm & touch.
it is no blessing, is it,
to exist in a body
isolated from the world.
devoid of passion;
a life of purpose
is damning without desire.
the lack of which strips a caress
into a soul-less touch,
the worshiping kiss of the mouth
into a platonic peck,
a shout of celebration
into a whisper that fades
until no more.

i do not believe denial
is good for the soul;
it becomes stripped of essence.

those who love me, deny me; taking
enforced celibacy as sacred inspiration.
reducing  heaven’s gift of joy
into a guilty service.
a hungry soul stripped
into a pale shade
that will run after you no more.

i wished to fly
but not at the cost of leaving the ground.
angel, you should have warned
that my wings would only come alone
and the smile would be bitter.


Ariel

September 16,2004

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Sober

As young, we haunted reason;
Drunk on desire, ideals and trust,
Like liquid sustenance, like secret dew.
My laughs were clear and bright as morning air.

Did he yet feel the time pale away?

The world devoured my angel,
Unreliable creature!  I saw him run, not linger.

Reality is long in coming.
But ask the fevered lips this…
Ask who celebrates our hunger.


Ariel

September 10. 2004

Defeat


I have finally learned my lesson;
It distills down to
                                          Being a singularity.

I expect no sympathy, no mercy;
Even lovers will not grant true favors.

Ariel

My Truth


Life is not forgiving.

Does not matter
            If it was a mistake
Made by me
            or by others
As it was with Mother
            I will pay the penalty

There is no circumventing
            Certain retribution


Ariel
September 9, 2012

Placed

Placed between
God and world,
My frustrated hunger devours
            The soul’s cry.

No longer will I
            Worship
Reason-less trust
            And romantic kindness.

Life and Love
            Grants no mercy.
Mere betrayal  cannot exist
            Within the void.

Ariel

September 9, 2004

Pale Dance

Goddess put a curse
Between you and I;
Covered our flickering whispers
With music haunted in hunger.

A pale dance
As my soul dies.

Not beautiful, I.
A woman, stripped by day;

Feels no worship

            Caress her.


Ariel

September 9, 2004

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Sensate

Red head caressed

My petal’s sensual flame.
Thy passion rose in it,
Drunk on
A river of secret honey.


Ariel

Monday, June 4, 2012

The Other Party

It is strange
Being the other party.
The one being asked to let go.

It’s not that I didn’t sympathize with those
Who loved me more than is wise.
I just did not love them as much as they wanted.

I don’t tell them that though my heart is open,
It is guarded.  Access is only as
Deep as my trust.

Now it’s revealed that I am not wise;
My love runs deep. The question for me remains
Are you still hesitant to trust?


Ariel
September 2, 2004

Pisces Unfinished
CC Willow


Sunday, June 3, 2012

Stark Naked

The stark tree towered over the pink and green grove;
Naked of leaves, it’s twisted
Limbs exposing all its imperfections.
Surely it was no taller than
The others clothed and covered with late spring’s garb.
Yet this immodest tree seduces the eye to it alone;
Its branches, sculpted by life to a uniqueness of its own,
Are displayed wide and unashamed.
Its bent shaped limbs continue their reach for the sky.
Proud, its unabashed stance giving it added height;
The stark tree towered high,
As high as the bare rock cliff in its shadow.


                                                Ariel
                                June 29, 2004
Three, Brother, Taft Bay
CC Willow